Since today I am on vacation until next Monday. The goal: to have more time for the children. More time for building a house. More time for the family. More time to relax.
In theory, that should have worked out. In fact, however, problems arise again and again during the construction of the house, which one did not expect at all. Today’s example: The photovoltaic system is 20 cm from the roof because it is installed horizontally. It makes a “nice picture” from a distance, but from a closer view it is impossibly far away from the roof tiles. We bought the whole thing under different conditions. On inquiries on our part is now talked out. So what to do? Tomorrow the work will be completed. Then the panels will be set. We could cancel the whole thing. Then, however, many of our brand-new roof tiles are damaged, because they were drilled for fastening. Glorious. We don’t know what to do right now and there are only a few hours left until the next day.
Further compromises? Well, the garage will never be as purchased. After all, we have to have it touched up. But touching up is not like: Just fit, just fine. Well, and many other things.
When I talk to the neighbors around us, they just say: Yeah, we know. Yes, a friend of mine… they’re also building right now…. the basement is now only half as big, because…
I don’t know. I was too naive at the beginning. I was stupid. Now I’m wiser, more annoyed, more disappointed. And I still say that building a house is the biggest mistake of my life. Or… one of my biggest.
And whatever happened to “having more time for”. Well, nothing. The children suffer because we suffer. We have a little more time, but in it we struggle with more problems. And that’s what annoys me even more. That we all suffer, first and foremost my children. Because of Corona, the lack of kindergarten, the lack of other children, they are totally screwed up anyway. And now mom and dad are just stressed all the time. I can tell by the look on their faces. They explode just as quickly as I do. And that can’t be allowed. But how are you supposed to stay cool with all that? I try to hug the little ones as often as possible. To tell them in the few clear minutes I have how much I love them. But that is not enough.
We don’t even need to talk about relaxation. It’s rather hard to relax under pressure.
Well, I’m going to spend the whole night with my wife thinking about what we’re going to do. Tomorrow morning, I’ll be at the construction site, discussing with the excavator driver how the trench for the multi-section connection will be made - for this, I’ll have to remove a piece of scaffolding, which I’m not actually allowed to do (and can’t do at all).
What keeps coming back to me, and has been for a long time, is that life is just 08/15. Everything is just half-hearted. Here a little, there a little. Nothing with 100% commitment. The result is everywhere as to be expected: crap.